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#1
07-06-2021, 01:51 PM
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The shitpipe
Today was the day for my last colonoscopy.
It was also my first. Never again. I think descending naked into an erupting volcano would be a much more pleasant experience. I think I’d rather skydive into a field of cactus without a parachute than go through that again. I can’t believe that in 2021 they can’t figure out an easier way to do it. The doctor did tell me I’m a perfect asshole
__________________
------------------------------------------------ I know you think you understood what I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."        [            
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#2
07-06-2021, 02:38 PM
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I'm overdue for my second one, covid got in the way of those plans.
Had some of the polyps they removed on the first time. I did dig the drugs they gave me on followed by my comedy skit while laying on my left side while the aliens probed me. 
__________________
Hi I'm Tom. Darned if I can remember anyone else's name.   MDCGA The Road Goes On Forever... To Ride is Life... In search of the Doof 43. . . .          ...... .  . .  Colorado Motel Wreckers 2012 ... Midnight Riders of The Beartooth 2013...      
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#4
07-06-2021, 06:58 PM
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We're you awake for it?
 I wasn't, and I don't remember a thing.
__________________
     Kimber     
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#9
07-07-2021, 07:06 AM
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Had one in 2010. Found a stage 4 cancer tumor. Lymph nodes and liver involved. A year of Chemo and Radiation, 11” of bowel removed and I’m still around. Who knows how the story would have gone had I passed on the colonoscopy .
Just saying.
__________________
 Master of Contemplation
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#11
07-07-2021, 11:18 AM
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Well, the prep didn’t go so well. It was a 2 dose called suprep. I took the first dose and … nothing. Well, nothing came out, but I felt like I was going to explode. Severe cramping, with no relief. After about 12 hours of that I thought there was no way they could go ahead with the procedure. So, about 2 am I took the second dose. After another 2 hours of really bad discomfort came the relief. So for the next 2 hours I was in the bathroom, until it was time to leave for the hospital. Barely made it there (45 minute drive). The procedure itself was great. I slept through it. Then the after gas. Oh my gawd! They must have inflated me like an inner tube. Believe me when I tell you not to trust a fart afterwards. Then another 45 minute drive home.
My gut still hurts today. Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro
__________________
------------------------------------------------ I know you think you understood what I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant." [
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#12
07-07-2021, 01:33 PM
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It's the prep that kills me drinking or trying to drink a gallon of that slimy lemon flavored concoction. I had more polyp's the 2nd time but all was good. Been about 2 or 3 years. I'm sure I'm over due.
__________________
   Cloudrider 2010 Former Original Doof Creator of the 43 & 7 hand signs... Original Cat Herder KC.
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#13
07-07-2021, 06:40 PM
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Quote:
Sent from my SM-G998U1 using Tapatalk
__________________
------------------------------------------------ I know you think you understood what I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant." [
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#14
07-07-2021, 09:49 PM
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didn't they put a Propofol line in you? great stuff.
One minute you are talking with the Dr. or nurse in the prep room and 20 minutes later you wake up in recovery and don't remember a thing. It's not just for Michael Jackson.
__________________
 “We are all capable of believing things which we know to be untrue, and then, when we are finally proved wrong, impudently twisting the facts so as to show that we were right. Intellectually, it is possible to carry on this process for an indefinite time: the only check on it is that sooner or later a false belief bumps up against solid reality, usually on a battlefield.”—George Orwell, 1946 "The race may not always be to the swift nor the victory to the strong, but that's how you bet." - or - that's how the smart money bets...attributed to Damon Runyon
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#15
07-07-2021, 10:04 PM
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All I can tell you is that I have a 'zipper' line from above my bellybutton to just above my......uhhhhh.....you know. On the table for for about 8 hrs. And thanks Patti, I still have the blanket!
My colonoscopy..............I've had more discomfort from a stubbed toe. 
__________________
Tom  "Age is a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it don't matter."...Satchel Paige "Mother Nature may dictate I grow older but there ain't nothin' nor nobody can make me grow up." ..Me                
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